Unconditional Conditions?

In all honesty, everyone wants a good friend--a real friend. No one wants a comrade who will leave you in the dust, treats you poorly, and makes you feel horrible about yourself after you have with her (as I am referring to female friends, not guy friends). If people were like that, you wouldn't want to be friends with them! Usually, friends come under similar criteria and have ideal protocol: honest, funny, adventurous, trustworthy, loyal, dependable, etc. Everyone wants a friend when they have been heartbroken and hurt, your friend will come to the rescue with a tub of ice cream, you favourite magazine, and listen to you rant, sob, and whine about your misfortune. Afterward, she will give you kind and warm advice, not because she wants you to fix what has been broken, but to pick up the broken pieces, put them together again, and move on. In times of distress, you want to know that your friend is there and she will continue being your friend during turbulent times. There are no strings attached to your friendship; she merely enjoys your company and simply just wants to be your friend without the complications that people pen on such comradeships. However, what happens when there are strings attached? When people are friends with you just for your assets? What happens when people leave you when you say the right thing just because it's the right thing? Oftentimes (and I speak of my own experience), a friend must make a difficult decision: say the right thing because it is the right thing to do, even if she doesn't see it, or ignore what your heart is telling you and continue being her friend. A friend isn't a friend unless she has your best interests at heart with good intentions and morals. You know you can depend on her because she is honest, loyal, and morally correct. But...what happens when you have to tell the hard truth, the truth that no one wants to hear? Do you say it then? Or do you shut your mouth because you want her to still be your friend, despite that you are forcing and compromising in the process? Everyone wants a good friend; but when it's time to prove it, all it is are empty words. When people lose friends on account of telling the truth (or is aligning to God's Word) and they grew offended and have deserted them, you see their true colours, you see what they are really like as a friend. After all, a person's true character is revealed under challenging, pressuring, and difficult adversities. They aren't very good friends. You are a good friend to them but they are not good friends with you. Especially when it was time to prove it. When I have told several of my friends the truth, not because I had intentions to hurt them but because I had their best interests at heart, they grew offended at my analysis, confrontation, judgement, whatever they wish to call it, and stopped speaking with me completely. Perhaps then it might have sounded harsh (to anyone who doesn't want to hear the truth, but knows it, no one wants to be told that in the face, to spoken in existence, because that means acknowledging it, and if you don't acknowledge it, maybe it will go away...), but later, it will be recognized as a good deed. If you are sick, do you want people to incubate that sickness, or do you want people to tell you that there is another way? Of course! Even when it requires hard work, discipline, and tearing away pieces of your flesh? Well...hold on a minute...are you telling me that you are better than me/you know more than me/that makes you better than that you know that? If you're hurt, you want to be mended, correct? Correct. Even if it requires putting your flesh to rest? Well...I'm not so sure about that. A real friend is someone who is willing to sacrifice one's friendship in order to say the truth because you love them, because you want to see your friend better (and not in bondage, sickness, or brokenness), and because you know what the right thing to do is...even if that costs you your friendship. If someone refuses to accept that (or even mediate on your words), then they are not your friends. You accept their hard-hearing truth, but they can't accept yours? What a double standard. And I thought friendships came without double standards, such as hypocrisy. Is that the kind of friend you want? Certainly not me.

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